Giving up

I give up... I'm tired.

I'm so lonely and I am so lost. I can't listen to a sad song anymore without bursting into tears. I am an emotional wreck and I want it to stop.

I want all the pain to just go away.

I can't go on and look for love anymore. I keep on searching, I keep on hoping and I keep on losing. I am tired. I have no more energy to spare. 

Why can't it just work out. Just this once. And just for a while. Just long enough for me to get some energy back. Because right now I am drained. I fight and I fight... and now I give up.

Does that make me weak? Does that mean I don't care?

It doesn't matter... All I know is that I have reached a point where there is just no going forward anymore. I don't want to be alone anymore. I want to be with someone who cares for me and loves me. A used to say: "You're my princess. I will give you the world." And what do I have now? Sad songs and many many tears.

Why can't a person, just this once, mean what they say and not disappoint me. Why can't I just get some happiness. 

I am giving up. I have lost faith. I don't want to search anymore... or better, I can't. 

So what do I do know? Wait for better days? 

I have no clue... all I know is that I am not a patient person and whatever is going on in my life right now better get back on track soon or else I will go mad.