548 km. A 5 hours and 44 minutes car ride. A 3 hours and 39 minutes train ride. Those are the numbers I am looking at with a big lump in my throat. These numbers that are becoming the biggest obstacle in my life right now.
In the past I was wondering if the man I am falling in love with is just a rebound, but now, six weeks into this relationship, I am a hundred percent sure that he isn't.
Have you ever met someone and it just feels like you've known them your whole life? Me and Thomas we spend great moments together. His presence comforts me and I feel so safe. For the first time, I feel like I can rely on him. Like I can trust him. Like he will be there for me.
We spend the most amazing week together. Spending our days with each other and falling asleep in each others arms. I love waking up next to him.
And now I moved. 548 km away from the man I want to be with. So is it going to work out? Will I able to keep him close to me, even though a big distance is separating us?
I am terrified of losing him and never before has it been that hard to choose my career over my love life. Has the thought crossed my mind to just take his offer and move in with him? I can't say that it hasn't. Is it crazy? Most probably. Six weeks. It sounds like nothing. And yet for some reason, it felt so intense.
Things shouldn't be this easy, this comfortable, this obvious. But they are. And it scares me, to have to give it up. I know I won't mind the few hours in a train every week, if it means that we can spend a couple of days and nights together. All I am asking is for him to be able to accept it to. To be patient as well. I hope he can handle a long-distance relationship and understand that if we can get through this, we really can get through anything.
What's meant to be will always find its way.
I will find my way back to him. If he waits for me.
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